JOKES

• Modern Time Prayers
  **********************************
  Oh God.......
  
  Help me log on without fretting
  Guide me as I'm interneting
  Bless my downloading and uploading
  Keep my browser from exploding
  May my website be protected
  Let not my password be rejected
  Keep my line always connected
  And may all my inputs be accepted
  Please keep all my programs alive
  And to remember to back up my hard drive
  And protect my computer from a crashing dive
  From a virus that would make it a nesting hive

• THERE IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT 
  
  While cruising at thirty thousand feet, the 
  airplane shuddered. A passenger looked out the 
  window. "Good lord!" he screamed. "One of the 
  engines just blew up!" 
  
  Other passengers left their seats and came 
  running over; suddenly the aircraft was rocked 
  by a second blast as yet another engine exploded 
  on the other side. 
  The passengers were in a panic now, and even the 
  flight attendants couldn't maintain order. Just 
  then, standing tall and smiling confidently, the 
  pilot strode from the cockpit and assured 
  everyone that there was nothing to worry about.
  
  His words and his demeanor seemed to make most 
  of the passengers feel better, and they sat down 
  as the pilot calmly walked to the door of the 
  aircraft. There, he grabbed several packages 
  from under the seats and began handing them to 
  the flight attendants.
  
  Each crew member attached the package to his or 
  her back.
  
  "Say," spoke up an alert passenger, "aren't 
  those parachutes?"
  
  The pilot said they were. 
  
  The passenger went on, "But I thought you said 
  there was nothing to worry about?" 
  
  "There isn't," replied the pilot as the third 
  engine exploded. "We're going to get help."

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